


Thoughts of How

by Cawaiiey



Series: Thoughts [4]
Category: Persona 4, Persona Series
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-02
Updated: 2014-03-02
Packaged: 2018-01-14 08:30:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1259749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cawaiiey/pseuds/Cawaiiey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fourth installment in the Thoughts series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thoughts of How

How?

His first thought after coming to terms with his feelings for Yu were to find where he was and confess. Initially, he thought it would be simple just to bolt down to the classroom and find him but, when he arrived, his partner was nowhere to be seen. Chie and Yukiko informed him that he had left, saying he wasn't feeling well. That was odd but he supposed he could wait until after school. As the day wore on, he grew increasingly anxious, mind buzzing and clicking and running over what he would say to him. However, his courage dwindled as nervousness took its place. It was terrifying to think about how his words could completely eradicate their friendship. All he could think about was...

How?

He could phrase it in a way that could be taken as either an admission of attraction or admiration. Or maybe he could man up and just say it to his face. The idea was almost physically crippling. He ended up compromising and promising himself that he would call him right when school ended. As if on cue, the bell signaled the end of the school day, causing Yosuke to jump in his seat. Chie and Yukiko asked him if he wanted to come with them to Junes but he politely declined, revising his earlier promise to call when he got home. He did walk with them partway, splitting off when he got to his neighborhood. The house was empty and eerily silent, serving to add to his nervousness. 

How?

He spent ten minutes gathering up the courage to call him. Then another 5 going through his contacts and pretending he didn't see Yu Narukami there at the bottom, going to the top and scrolling through again. Finally, he pressed the name and watched as the little phone icon popped up. He was shaking as he pressed the phone to his ear, hearing the dial tone. It reminded him of the gong of a clock, signaling his impending doom. When he heard a click, he began speaking immediately, only to be cut off by Yu's voicemail box intro. 

How?

Dumbfounded, Yosuke sat there for a moment before clicking the "end call" button. It only took him a second to call back, fueled by the fact that he had decided to confess and he wasn't about to not just because he didn't answer the first time. Even though it was odd for Yu not to answer on the first ring, he didn't let it stop him. This time, the dial tone rang three times before he heard the click. He waited a moment, hearing a breath, and then he simply said, 

"How are you?" 

It sounded a bit odd to his ears, seeing as he had rehearsed his little speech dozens of times in his head. He wasn't supposed to ask how he was, that was for sure. But it rolled off his tongue easily. Maybe he could somehow get their conversation headed towards that topic and confess then? He would find a way to do it. Yosuke heard his best friend's breathing stutter on the other end, his brows furrowing a bit in worry. Chie and Yukiko had said he was feeling sick. He might have to confess another time then, he didn't want to stack this on too of him when he was feeling like shit. But then he spoke and his voice was flat and his words were like ice shards digging into his abdomen. 

"Good, how are you and your girlfriend?" 

Girl...? He must have seen. But how? He had been up with her on the roof. The only conclusion he could come to was that Yu had followed him. But that was absurd, their calm leader would have no reason to investigate him while he was getting confessed to. Was he worried about the girl? Maybe he wanted to date her. Yosuke only served to confuse himself further as his mind spun but, eventually, he regained enough composure to say, "I don't have a girlfriend, Yu, but I'm fine." 

How?

He could only grasp at how his best friend had found out or why he decided to ask him about it in that flat tone of voice. The idea that Yu followed him was the only logical explanation, really. Before Yosuke could even try and ask his partner how he knew, he was cut off by a shaky, hopeless-sounding voice.

"How can you lie to me?"

Lie? Like he would lie to Yu about anything, let alone about his relationship status. "I'm not lying, partner!" The brunet felt his heart sink as frustration pervaded his thoughts. If his partner didn't believe him now, how could he possibly persuade him to? This had never happened before, not even once. Yu always believed him, always! He gritted his teeth and felt a surge of dumb confidence in his veins, hand tightening around the phone. His lips and tongue were forming the words before he could stop them. 

"How could I have a girlfriend when I'm in love with you?"


End file.
